Relationships
As humans, we spend most of our lives developing and working on different types of relationships. Each relationship we have is unique.
We all have our own ideas about what a relationship means, how to begin one, how to stay in one, and even how to end one. There are no standard how-to's when it comes to relationships. For some, it may be love at first site. For others, a romantic relationship may develop slowly over time.
Sometimes it feels impossible to find someone who's right for you — and who thinks you're right for him or her!
A healthy relationship makes you feel good about yourself and your partner. You have fun together, value each other and you can be yourselves.
Basic qualities of a healthy relationship:
Do you and your partner respect each other’s feelings, wishes and opinions? Do you listen to each other’s ideas? Do you treat each other as friends?
Without respect, relationships can be hurtful. Many of us think it is only a physical action that will hurt someone. But insults and unkind words hurt just as much. They can destroy our self-esteem—how we feel about ourselves.
Do you and your partner trust and support each other? Do you understand each other’s need for friends and family? Do you feel sure of each other’s love? Do you have faith in each other’s decisions?
Without trust, relationships can cause jealousy and unhappiness. Jealous partners doubt the other’s love or commitment. Building trust, by talking, listening, being honest, respecting each other’s feelings and having fun together is the best cure for jealousy.
Are you and your partner fair and honest with each other? Do you both admit when you are wrong? Do you both tell the truth without fear? Do you both forgive mistakes?
Without honesty and fairness, relationships can be hurt by lies and anger. No one is always right or always wrong. In healthy relationships, partners admit their mistakes and can expect forgiveness.
Do you and your partner treat each other as equals? Do you give and take equally? Do you both make decisions about how you spend your time together? Do you both compromise.
Without equality, unhappiness is likely as one person takes control. In healthy relationships, neither partner is “in charge”.
Is your relationship based on good communication? Do you talk openly about your feelings with each other? Are you able to work through disagreements? Do you listen to each other without judgement?
Without good communication, there are a lot of misunderstandings.
Respect, trust, honesty, fairness, equality and the ability to communicate in a caring way are all great qualities to a healthy relationship.
In reality, no relationship is perfect, all relationships take work. Don’t have unrealistic expectations. Be open to working together on what is important to your relationship.
The opposite of a healthy relationship is an unhealthy relationship. Unhealthy relationships revolve around control, fear, and lack of respect. Unhealthy relationships can involve threats, name-calling, blaming, guilt-tripping, jealous questioning, and outright violence.
Being in an unhealthy relationship hurts your self-esteem. You owe it to yourself to get out.
Who can I call in our region to get more information?
If you suspect you're in a unhealthy relationship, there's a good chance you are. Perhaps you think that you'd be better off without the relationship but are afraid to leave it. If that's the case, get help from a parent, school counsellor, friend, social worker or anyone else you trust.
Your health care provider or Algoma Public Health can discuss options for counselling services.
Teen power and control wheel
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